17 Comments

This is one of those stories where the first person sucks you in and you can't look away. Great job. I loved the transition to the realisation.

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author

Thank you so much, Hanna!

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What a twist! Fantastic story!

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Thank you for reading, Liz!

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This was a great read! You should be proud of yourself. I loved the twist ending.

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author

Thank you so much!

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Jul 2Liked by Bridget Riley

THAT TWIST THOUGH. The redemptive ending. I love it. "I had thought of everything except the guilt"....

You really made the most of that word restriction, too! I know that's not easy.

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author

Thank you! I loved writing this one, and I’ve been waiting (impatiently) to hear back about the results so that I could share it. Squeezing a story, particularly a mystery, into 2000 words is something else. 😅

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What a heartbreaking family dynamic. Incredibly well written.

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author

Thank you! Family dynamics are something I’m trying to tap into more with my writing, so that aspect of this story was a little bit of an experiment.

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Ooooo! I didn’t know you could do that!

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I spotted this on notes, but didn’t get an email. Did one go out? (Just checking in case something went wrong…)

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author

Hi Mark! I published this story to web-only for now, so no email went out yesterday. I wanted to submit it to the Lunar Awards but didn’t want to spam people’s inboxes with stories, especially since Down in the Holler just finished on Saturday. But I’m planning to publish this one with an email in a few weeks!

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That's a seriously good story! I thoroughly enjoyed it. Especially as the main character in my own serialisation has a dissociative disorder (multiple personality), which involves memory blank spots when one of the alters takes over. So towards the end I thought ah, she's got MPD and it was her alter that did it. But then, no, a different twist.

Your version, with a 'gift' works really, really well... [I'm going to share as a note separately because this comment has a spoiler!]

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author

Thank you so much! Oooh, I'll have to read your story - I've been lowkey obsessed with MPD for a long time.

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You're welcome! I do love a bit of magical realism as well.

I hope you'll enjoy my story, although bear in mind as a serial it will take a while before the MPD really emerges (although you would have an interesting sort of meta-knowledge gap), unless you start with the character's journal (which has jumped ahead a bit - that's the Journal-K stuff). I do love stories with an offbeat psychology to them, especially as it allows for out of the ordinary characters that the reader doesn't necessarily have to like, plus you can be controversial and get away with it! The bit that is still somewhat hidden is the cause of the MPD, which ends up being the real mystery.

I shall have to peruse your other writing as well in due course when I have time...

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That sounds fascinating! I’m hoping that I’ll be able to start it tonight when the kids go down! I also enjoy writing and reading narrators who it’s not always easy to like.

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